So, my FIL is a secret POS. In public’s he’s a sweet 61 year old, extrovert, seemingly a loving husband, father and grandfather. He plays stupid in a charming way like a Gilligan type character. In private, he is a controlling, manipulative, unstable asshole who always throws digs and used to beat my MIL in front of my husband when he was a child. My MIL is stuck in this marriage, she hasn’t worked in 30 years, she has no bank account, no drivers license, her name is not on their home, she doesn’t have a single bill in her name. He has kept her a ghost so she is completely reliant on him. It’s very possible she is suffering from Stockholm syndrome. He doesn’t speak to any of his immediate family because they see through his act. His two younger sons apparently never witnessed the abuse and are oblivious to his true behavior. My husband recognizes his dad as a controlling abuser, he deals with anger issues stemming from the abuse he witnessed as a child and goes to therapy to make sure his anger is in check. My husband is definitely the smartest person in his family, and has always been punished for this and his memory of the truth about his father. Well FIL was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. In my opinion it’s that Bitch Karma coming back to punish him for all the shit he’s done over the years. Well my son is 13 months old, my husband and I have made a conscious effort to limit his time with that side of the family because they are truly toxic people and have angry outbursts regularly. My Aunt thinks that a Cancer diagnosis means you get a free pass for the past and that we need to bring our son around him more often. So what do you all think?