tearing, episiotomy. good, bad, ugly info

first time Mom here, first pregnancy, first delivery in about 5 months. I'm absolutely terrified. not of the pain, but of ruining my vagina. stupid I know, but the idea or my body tearing or being cut down there makes me sick to my stomach. I've talked to other moms I know and they all seem to say the same thing, you'll tear but it varies how bad. so I guess I'd there anything to prevent this? I've read about perineal massage. but is that it?