My previous marriage had so many issues....like soooooooo many.
He wasn't very romantic, he didn't do things for me that husbands should do as far as help me around the house, help me with my son, or make me feel special at all, just the opposite.
Every holiday I would get my feelings hurt. Christmas I wouldn't get any gift from him Valentine's Day I would never have anything done for me or given to me. And birthdays were the same way.
I would go above and beyond trying to make the days special for him which is why it hurt so bad when the gestures weren't reciprocated.
I am now married to my second husband, absolutely wonderful. Not just because he does try to make holidays special for me, but because he tries to make every day special. He makes me feel special every day. Last year for Valentine's Day my husband made me pizza roses. This year we are in a bit of a financial crunch. So we won't be doing anything super special for Valentine's Day. I got up and tried to make him coffee and he got up and made me coffee at the same time. He has to go out of town today for an MRI on his back. Before in the "Bad Time" I felt selfish for feeling like I deserved gifts and holidays. I've come to the realization that it wasn't that I felt like I needed, or deserved gifts, it was that I needed and felt like I deserved feeling special. And now that I have a husband that makes me feel like that all the time, getting gifts or doing special things on holidays, although very special to me, doesn't mean the same thing to me as it did.