So I need some help. lol

I took an OPK and tested positive for an LH Surge which is totally new for me because I'm not ovulating when glow tells me I'm ovulating.

I just figured, it Valentine's day, test to see if I'm ovulating so I can use my new fertility friendly lubricant that I haven't used yet... and I really needed to pee and I was like "Shit, why not?!"

Anyway. I also checked my cervical mucus which is watery and if I remember, that's another sign of ovulation, right?

Then I checked my cervical position, and according to a very educational video on YouTube, my cervix is low, closed, and firm and that indicates that I am not ovulating.

So is my body weird or will I be actually ovulating within the next few days?