Does anyone ever wonder?

This has always been a touchy subject that i kept to myself. But I wanna know if its bad of me for wondering.. so 5 years ago (8th grade) i was in a relationship with a guy and he broke up with me because he felt that he was dragging me down. He told me it had nothing to do with me but for the previous year he has been off and on suicidal. Of course this broke my heart and made me think i did everything wrong. He told me that if i told his parents he would do it. And didn’t contact me or message me back. Fast forward to today i am a freshman in college and have been dating my man for 2 years. But i think back and wonder how he is doing... is that bad. I love the man I’m with and won’t ever leave him but my mind always wonder if I should have done something. But he seems to be doing fine now based on what i see from Facebook.. idk