Am I stupid

I still love my ex no matter what he put me through I still love him and it hurts that I’m friends with him he tells me he loves me too but he never hurt me again the he did and as much as he loves and wants to be with me he can’t and he won’t hurt and I wanna try again but I just keep my mouth shut cause idk what to say for him to change his mind.. his mom even wants me back in his life and she doesn’t even accept anyone else but me idk I love him so much I just want him