edited: porn and women hypocrites

ok so I've seen a lot of posts recently about porn and how it's cheating and honestly it baffles the crap outta me, I just don't get it. Each person's opinion is different I know and I don't care about the relationships just the thought process of why this is cheating yet other sexually explicit media are ok.

Someone else brought up an extremely valid point and no one said shit about it so I'm curious about people's thoughts. I have no issues with porn and also read urban fantasy (crime stories involving werewolves, vampires and the like) my husband calls these "girl porn" and It kinda IS, one series in particular is very heavy with the sex scenes, usually at least 2 in a book, does it turn me on and find it's way into fantasies? yup, is it cheating? no. although after reading y'all's posts I think a lot of people would actually consider me reading a fantasy/romance novel cheating...now with how popular these shows books and movies are; I gather a large part of the population enjoy them, yet from glow discussions there are a lot of women that see it as cheating and grounds for then end of a relationship

how many people read romance novels with sex scenes..are you going to tell me it never made you wet or you've never materbated after?

how about watching magic Mike or fifty shades????? I honestly don't like those movies (the trilogy of sleeping beauty by Anne rice is much better but those movies are insanely popular and no matter where I go there is at least 1-3 people that want to see it or have read it. but yet so many want to say a man is nasty or weak if he watches hard core porn?? Pretty sure sience has found men are more visual with arrousal and women more emotional, leading to getting turned on by all the elements of the story. A lot of media and forms of entertainment are in essance at least by my by standards is watching softcore porn, just because it's rated R instead of NC17 doesn't matter when pg13 movies have boobs galore and fuck is said in some of them....

if so many people don't like the shows, books or movies that have STRONG sexual undertones (=in my brain softcore porn) how are they so popular?

another point mentioned on a few other posts, people mentioned their husband having access to pictures and videos of themselves therefore not needing porn of models. I have a hard time believing that if you're that against porn you'd let someone carry around naked photos/video of yourself, just genuinely curious on this and how it's ok for pornographic photos of yourself is ok but commercialized porn is nasty and wrong.

Would you stop enjoying these things if your partner thought you emotionally & physically desired the main character?? (even though it'd never happen)