how to tell my mom !!!

ok a little back story 😑

when I was pregnant my mom came to visit around April and left on May 23 ,2017 I was due on June 5 and well she left so it was only my bf and me we both don't have family close and well a little fast forward I went to visit my family so they can meet her in August 17 I went for almost 3 weeks and don't get me wrong it felt good to see my family and be with my parents but it was toooo much being with them 😑😑 so now they want me to go back for my daughter's 1 birthday and well they are planning her birthday without asking me what I want and to be honest I don't want to to go I just want to do something with her and just my bf but my mom hates it when thing's are not done her way she's using my daughter has bait and trying to make me feel bad that I'm far and they can't see her and the plane tickets are REALLY EXPENSIVE

update:

I told her she still doesn't understand what I want she started saying that he doesn't have to be there for her birthday ok tell me this I hope I'm not the only one thinking it but it seems like she doesn't want him there right ?