dildo

i’m 14 and always really want to have sex but i know i can’t do that so i want to buy a dildo but i’m afraid that my dad will see it bought off my card and how am i supposed to hide a rubber penis from my mom when she’s always snooping in my room i was tempted to ask her to buy me one and be like well it’s either this or sex ok but that’s way to awkward of a conversation i can’t even say tampon i text it to her ugh