Starting to struggle??

After a break up in an abusive relationship it hasn’t been long since we’ve broken up or I broke up with him and one min I miss him the next min I dont ...I’ve been setting out making plans with my friends and hanging out with my family but when I’m not with them I’m by myself because I still have to work and it just bothers me still.....I know it takes time and I try to keep in mind why i made the decision but even tho it’s the best decision for me I can’t stop thinking about how he’s feeling even tho i know he wasn’t thinking about me when he was doing those awful things to me....we were together a year and suffered through a stillbirth so I’m sure that’s why I feel extremely attached...I just feel so confused 💔😩 I do miss him but I can’t go back