after the first abortion

hi everyone, I don't really have somebody to talk with about what I've been through, so I will write this post, because I need to get it out. When I was 17 I had an ovarian surgery that decrease my fertility. indeed, I've been trying to get pregnant for 2 years without success. in 2016 I met my ex boyfriend, whom I dated for one year. He turned into a disaster, he disappeared for days, came back, quit every job after 1 month, asked me money.. he never let me talk to my boy friends and he was accusing me of cheating him, I caught him checking my phone many times and getting mad over nothing. The last month we dated, I found out he cheated on me with several girls and stole money from me for playing online. I felt disgusted and blocked all of his contacts. I found out that I was pregnant a month later. I got pregnant one week before my period, with a incomplete performance (he didn't come) . I took some time to think what to do, but I ended up having an abortion. he also didn't support me, he was actually already dating someone and I could not do this alone. I was sure about what I was doing, but right after that, I regretted it so much I could not spend a day without thinking about that. currently, Im trying to get pregnant without success, I feel devastated! I'm afraid now I will not be able to get pregnant again. I spend nights awake praying for the kid I lost, and I can get over it.