Should I feel bad?

Question

Is it bad that I don’t want to tell my husband when I find out I’m pregnant because I don’t want his family to know and I can’t trust him to keep a secret. The reason I do not want to say anything before anyone jumps to conclusions is because I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks last year and I don’t want to announce till I at least find out the gender. His family is already starting on me and I’m not even pregnant yet... 😔
Edit: I can trust him with everything else but this. He believes his family should know when I don’t feel that way... 
He says things like so I’m not pregnant this isn’t my baby are you the only one who gets to make the decisions I have no rights when I try to say anything about wanting to keep quiet for awhile.

Answer

It’s bad that you can’t trust him to respect your wishes

Answer

Yes it’s bad. You need to be on the same page as to when you tell people. My husband always asked to make sure we both agreed.

Answer

That's harsh of him to say. I know it's an exciting feeling and it's great he's so excited to tell the news. However, after a miscarriage it's so scary to get too excited and tell everyone. I would try maybe saying "yes, this is your baby and I want you to be very involved. I'm still grieving over the little one we lost and I want to make sure that we're at least a trimester in before we share the news with everyone because I don't think I can take it if we lose another and we have to explain it publicly. " if he still can't even come close to understanding then I don't think it's bad to keep it to yourself, though it will likely cause many issues of distrust.

Should I feel bad?

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