Long story short: there’s this guy....

During a span of rocky 10 months, we’ve admitted to liking each other, though things have been rocky from the start for two reasons

1. I’m not allowed to have a boyfriend

2. He says he’s not allowed to date me either, but won’t tell me the reason why, though he does say some pretty unsettling things (“playing with fire”, “it’s sad because it has nothing to do with you” “it wouldn’t just effect me, it would effect others” “dangerous” “risky”)

I’ve snuck out to see him twice, and we’ve never had so much fun. Face-to-face he’s such a hopeless cheesy romantic, but in text he’s a hot-one-minute, cold-the-next.

During this last month, it’s been an endless cold. He’s been extremely distant, to the point where I tried to end things between us (we are “friends” but we reeeaaalllyy don’t act like it) but he came back, only to go days with leaving me on seen between messages. I finally confronted him about it, to which he owned up to it, but didn’t explain why, only saying upsetting things (“you’re too pure for me” “you deserve somebody better” “I’m not who you think I am”) to which I confessed indirectly being in love with him...to which he left me on seen...for a week and half before messaging me “hey”

I messaged him “hey” back an hour later

It’s been two days...and he hasn’t replied (seen again)

What confuses me the most is, what’s the point in coming back, only to leave?

For those thinking, just ask in person, he doesn’t go to my high school, we only see each other at the gym, but my dad works out with me, so we act like strangers in the gym. Our only way of communication is text.

I’ve considered the possibility of him being a fuckboy, but to that assumption, a lot of things don’t add up

1. It’s a LOT more trouble than it’s worth, if he’s a fuckboy. Between what’s between us is “forbidden” it’s hard to talk to each other, which is why we’ve only seen each other twice (snuck our to beach) in 10 months

2. Sex? I’m a Virgin, and he knows it. I made it clear sex probably wasn’t an option, he didn’t blink an eye, didn’t care so long as he got to hold my hand

3. He’s the sweetest hopeless romantic. He didn’t want to let go of me the first time we met up after 8 months of text. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting for this? I don’t plan on letting go for a long time” each time I tried to pull out of his arms out of shyness

4. If he wants sex, why wouldn’t he just go with a girl to school? Or somebody more...accessible?

I don’t understand him, it’s so confusing, it’s so hurtful, but I almost don’t think I’ve ever been happier when it comes to the romance game...

I don’t understand anything..advice would be appreciated...