Totally Discouraged

Hi ladies! I’m glad y’all have a new group I was so upset that bb eliminated our forums!! I’m having a crap of a month - we’ve been trying for over a year been through cysts a scare with a lump in my breast and just I’m broken. We dtd appt on this month and was SURE this was the month - I’ve been dieting and exercising and have already lost about 15 pounds (about 35 more to go!) and witch arrives on time but I only bled for about 12 hours - had spotting Monday afternoon and Tuesday morning then medium from around noon to 10 that night - next day pink spotting until evening and turned to brown next day small bit of brown on tp- today should be cd4 and nothing!!! I can’t stop crying I’m sure I’m just too old and going through menopause I’m breaking ladies I need some encouraging words