How do you stay positive!?

Ok all, I have the hardest time getting the negatives month after month. I keep thinking meet month is my month. I have pcos and I'm not the skinniest. How do you stay positive after negative tests? I put on a smile and tell my husband it's on but inside I want to cry thay I am not getting pregnant. I have always had irregular periods unless on birth control. Being on the pill I got pregnant so I feel I am failing now that I want a kid and have no birth control I can't get pregnant. Tips on staying positive?