6 years of hell , Finally stood up for myself . 🙌🏾

long story short my ex popped up at my house after me not hearing from him in 6 months. we had an on-and-off again relationship roller coaster ride. and every time I'm always the committed one. we Will be doing very well for like 6 months and then when he thinks that I'm getting too attached he starts to distance himself from me, it drives me crazy because he goes from talking to me everyday calling me cute little names hanging out with me taking me out just basically treating me good, staying over at my house kissing me hugging me to just basically ignoring me. well the last time was the last time for me. He has hurt my feelings for the last time. for so long I was afraid to stand up for myself and tell him how I really feel because I feared that he would walk away and not come back. I had gotten so comfortable with being around him and having him around that I feared him leaving for good if I stood up for myself . every time I thought that we would work out and every time I was wrong. Its like he gives me ALL of his attention & affection & then when he realizes that he's reeled me in again he leaves. 🙄 Well a couple weeks ago he pops up at my house after six months of NO COMMUNICATION , NO RHYME OR REASON for leaving . NOTHING ! YALL WHEN I SAY I WAS SO MAD ! I told his ass OFF and that's something that I've NEVER DONE , I had never cursed at him or even around him for that matter . (He had called me before he showed up, I didn't have his number saved and don't know it by heart so I didn't know who was calling me) When he showed up he tried to walk in my house and I pushed his ass right back out !! Told him he could stand outside . He was "confused" He had clearly been drinking 🙄 of course that's why he's here that liquid courage is a mother 😡 I ripped him a new one & NEVER FELT BETTER ! THEN! he had the nerve to ask me what do I want him to do and I said "Leave me the fuck alone". I express to him that he's selfish and he only wants to come around when it's convenient to him I'm done with being played and for him to not call me or come around anymore. I just want to say Once Upon a Time I think I loved him more than I loved myself, but I realized that I'm worth more than he was giving, y'all its been a constant battle with him , I've never been more proud of myself for FINALLY standing up for myself , I have cried so many days because of him .Questioning why I wasn't good enough. allowing him to run all over me & use me. THOSE DAYS ARE OVER !!! IM DONE WITH HIM! HES PLAYED WITH MY HEART AND FEELINGS FOR THE PAST 6 YEARS & IM DONE! Told him he can delete my number cause I damn sure don't have his saved . #HandsWashed There is more to this 6 years of hell story but this just sums it up oh yeah we started dating in 2010 but the hell didn't start until 2012. (our first breakup) .