I saw this and felt the need to share my story...

January 2017 i met my ex. He was sweet and kind but didn’t have a job but everyone sits there and tells you to stay with a work in progress and money isn’t everything so i did. I stayed. I got him jobs, convinced my parents to let him stay with us, fed him, payed for everything he wanted including his tv, tv stand, phone, and PS4. I was young and dumb and wanted to prove to him i was committed and would do anything for him. That sweet and loving guy changed and fast. He started calling me a butch and a whore.. everything you could think of.

July 2017 his child died. He was murdered by his mom and his moms gf. I jumped into this relationship accepting and loving his son because if i was going to be with him it was a packaged deal. My ex didn’t want to throw a funeral or anything for this poor 3 year old child. So because i love that child and felt he deserved one i put one together. I paid for my ex to get tattoos of his child’s name. (I’m getting mine covered up but it’s going to be sunflowers and it’s going to say you are my sunshine and his birth day and day of death. I love the child still don’t wanna match with his dad.)

The abuse started to get worse. He burned me, pushed me, choked me.. and then told me i couldn’t leave because “how could you leave someone the same year their child died?” I was the worst person in his eyes.

September 2017 i was emotionally out of the relationship. All the sex stopped but i was too scared to leave. I had a miscarriage and he told me i was too fat and didn’t deserve to be a mom and that’s why i lost the baby.

October 2017 i went into the hospital for diabetic ketoacidosis. I was diagnosed at 8 and was stupid and didn’t take care of myself. When i went into the hospital i was hours away from death. I should have died. I was in the hospital for 5 days in ICU. During that time i got a message from a girl that said he was cheating on me with her. Of course he denied it . But later that month he found out he had chlamydia so i knew it was true. I tried to leave. He took my medicine my car keys my clothes and all my belongings and hid them. And forced me outside in the cold. I was out there in shorts and a tank top for 2 hours. He finally let me back in. We fought because one of my family friends messaged me to see how i was doing (16 year old transgender born a girl wants to be a boy) well he thought that my family friend had a crush on me so he told me i had to tell him to leave me alone i said no. My ex said that i was a pedophile and only wanted his attention (I’m a nanny so in no way am i those things all I’ve ever wanted in my life was to be a mom) but besides all that i was scared and didn’t leave.

December 2017 i said it was enough and finally left. Packed most of my things accept the shit i couldn’t carry and left.

He stole money from me, he stole electronics from me, he stole everything that i left and sold it.

February 2018 i met my husband

March 2018 we officially were together

June 2018 we got married

I thank god everyday for my abusive ex because he made me love and appreciate my husband 10x more. My husband is my rock and the total opposite of what my ex was. I told him i was diabetic he told me we would handle as a team and we do. Told him about the miscarriage (no one but my ex and i know) and he was like it’s alright we will have one soon .’he makes all my dreams and child hood dreams come true. He’s my king. He respects me in every way. Opens doors, sits and talks to me instead of fighting, keeps open communication. He’s just perfect to me.

The point here is... it’s okay to move on. It’s okay to love again. It’s okay to move on fast. But you also have to remember to still look for those red flags (as i did with my husband) you still have to be cautious until everything is okay and you know that you are safe. I felt safe from day one. My husband is my safety. 💖💍

Ps sorry for the long post and thank you to everyone who read it 😊