My boyfriend and I have had problems since the beginning of our relationship really. He is twelve years older than I am (in his mid thirty’s) and he is not financially stable in any way and had to sell his old car so we could move to another state. We had our son so we have been trying to make It work for him.. but my boyfriend honestly just makes me feel really unhappy, insecure and like we will always be this dirt poor. I came from a family who always lived comfortably. So to always be late on rent and other bills is hard for me. It’s stressful. The power gets shut off, we have food stamps, it’s just HARD. I hate this lifestyle and am embarrassed.

BUT I wouldn’t mind staying if there was more LOVE. There just isn’t and It only gets worse. I’m still here after all the fighting, name calling and feeling like crap because we were irresponsible and accidentally fell pregnant AGAIN even while using condoms. We think a condom must have tore, slipped, something. I don’t know. It was just the icing on the cake to really make things worse for us.

Now I do NOT want to have two kids in an unhealthy, toxic relationship AND to live this poor. But I haven’t even told my family about this second baby, and I don’t know where i could stay. I feel like such a loser having to possibly move back in with my parents. They’ll be so disappointed and sad that I have done this to my life. I’m honestly just depressed and feel hopeless. What can I do? My boyfriend is cold, irresponsible and will probably never get his life together.