not sure about my husband

it's so funny because only last month I thought I might be pregnant. this month he hasn't touched me once, I went away for a week and he was by himself. hes very stressed atm and has a cafe, he has to do 2 jobs because his brother is sick, so he stays late to prep every night. hos friend supposedly helps but it always takes so long. my suspicion I guess is rooted from him nearly cheating on me a few years ago. had a room booked the lot to sleep with a woman but I found out. so I'll never know if it was the first time. before I went away I helped him at the shop. opened a draw and saw a condom. i dont know why I didnt say anything then but I just noticed it expired 2020. not sure on their lifespan for it to be old?? anyway I came back from my trip and had a look and it was gone! he knows I'm feeling neglected and has said I love you and would do anything for you but I'm lost. last night before bed I see him at his phone, what looked like deleting things while I was in bed. I got up this morning thinking I'd check to see if it were messages and there is a lock on his phone! in the past I've been caught snooping due to the cheating but not recently. there havent been any blow outs. there just seems like so many red flags. I'm so lost and hurt, i've tried listening to all these youtube videos about getting myself better and trust etc but am I just stupid?