Four year old bedtime - is this normal?

Question

We're on vacation with my sister, her husband, and their two kids. Bed time for her four year old is a nightmare. It involves lots of screaming and crying, and one of the parents has to lay with her until she falls fully asleep. If she wakes up while they're tiptoeing out, the whole thing starts over. The process takes hours.
As a FTM with a baby, I'm terrified that this is what I can expect when my LO hits toddler age. So I'm curious -- is this normal behavior? How did you set good bedtime routines with your toddlers?

Answer

Not normal. Set a routine and stick to it. Apparently at one point that is how they got him to sleep so that's what he expects now.

Answer

There may be a reason for it, so I wouldn't say its "abnormal" per say, but I have never experienced that with my kids. If you let your kids learn to fall asleep on their own from the beginning then this kind of situation is far less likely. And you can't indulge requests to "stay and cuddle" constantly either, even though sometimes it's hard to say no! My six year old will ask about every other night, but we usually will only do that once a week or so. Bottom line: unless there is some trauma that seriously requires your presence at bedtime, kids need to learn to fall asleep independently as soon as possible. Hugs kisses and a standard nighttime routine prior.

Answer

Not normal. They probably did not have a routine for her when she was younger, and they probably coddled her A LOT, and now it’s coming back to bite them in the ass.

Answer

Every kid is different 
what's normal to one isnt normal to another 
You can't look at a child and expect that from your own. nothing is normal when it comes to parenting ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Answer

my baby slept w me for almost the first year. at a year, bedtime was 7pm PERIOD. dinner,  bath time, then bed w a movie on. its a struggle but be consistent with your routine. your child needs to know whos boss. hes 1.5yr old now and goes to bed just fine.

Answer

No it’s not average behavior, but it’s some people’s reality. 
To encourage easy bedtimes: start young, have routines and stick to them. 
I held my baby while she slept a lot when she was really little. That created a habit in which she wanted to be held to sleep. Now she’s 14 months and for the past several months I can nurse her to sleep but then she wakes up when I put her down. So now her crib mattress is on the floor so I can nurse her to sleep and then just get up. 
I’ve (since) read a ton of articles, all which to put them down in their crib when drowsy but not asleep. That way they fall asleep on their own, in the own space. (We’re working on that part). 
Good luck 🙂

Answer

Yeah there’s definitely ways to create a pain free bedtime routine. That behavior can be learned even as babies so it’s important to establish a bedtime routine from the moment they’re born. Like for my bfs 1yr old, we give him a bath and let him run around in his pjs and then we put him to bed with a bottle. His routine isn’t the best imo which is why I plan to create my own for my baby. But when you stick to a routine so they understand that it’s time to go to sleep and create independence to where they don’t need to fall asleep being held or with you in the room, it’s a dream. Cosleeping is a big cause of this, which is why I don’t plan to do it with my child. Try a blanket or a stuffed animal for comfort, some people use bottles or pacifiers too but that’s up to you. I don’t care for it. But also that sucks that you had to go through that, I was staying with my sister for the first time and apparently my niece wakes up at 2am every night and screams her head off and wants a bottle...This girl was almost two. Needless to say I never stayed with her again 😂

Answer

it is not normal.
it is my reality though. 
my son cosleeps with me and autistic, he has to be near me and sleep with my arm. if I am lucky enough to sneak away,I can get 1-3 hours of me time before he wakes crying to the point of almost throwing up.

Answer

I honestly think it’s a phase. My son has been sleeping all night since he was 1.5 months old. But at 8-9 months we were having trouble getting him to sleep at his bed time. And then suddenly at 11 months-1 years old, he was back at his bedtime lol😅😅😅😅 (he’s now 1.5 years old) I was confused but happy it went back to normal. My brother has had trouble with my nephew since he was 1 year old (now 2.5). 
It really depends on baby how they get used to things. 
Also I think if the 4 year old isn’t tired, then he/she doesn’t wanna go to bed right? What I do is get my son tired just before bath every night 😬😬😬

Answer

That's not good...but it's apparently normal for them.  Check out the book/DVD "Happiest Baby on the Block" and "Happiest Baby Guide to Great Sleep" for good, easy to implement help with bedtime routines. They were really helpful for us.

Four year old bedtime - is this normal?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products