Overcoming Bitterness and Anger

I was sexually assaulted by someone I considered a close friend 4 days ago. I already suffer from severe anxiety disorder and depersonalization with intrusive thoughts. I am so incredibly worked up that I can’t even eat or function. My anxiety has never been this bad before, to where I can’t even function. I am so angry though. At the man who hurt me, and at my boyfriend, who during the situation I called and begged to come to my house, and if he had, the situation would have been prevented. I am also so angry at my bf for not spending one minute with me since the incident even though I’ve begged him to comfort me. Begged. He actually seems happy that this happened. Like he thinks I deserve it for trusting the man I saw. The man who promised he’d not hurt me and just be platonic and not lay a hand on me, who then hurt me. My boyfriend left and went on vacation and left me alone for another week. I am so angry and hurt. I don’t even know how to let go. I am also filled with anxiety and pain and hatred. I could really use some help.