Hello everyone,

I have a huge dilema. My husband just told me he wants his mom to move in with us! We are a very young couple! Only 30 years old and his mom is only 50! I don’t see why she should have to move in with us yet. I love his mom, but I love my privacy. I do not want her moving in to ruin the great marriage my husband and I have. What we have now, our dynamic, works! How do I tell him that I don’t want her to move in without sounding like an evil witch?

So...to answer some questions, she does not have a medical issue. She lives in Guam and doesn’t get paid well because the economical status in Guam is terrible. He feels that if she moves in, she will have more financial stability. And I agree, BUT if i agree to allow her to move in, I don’t want her to stay permanently. I would say 5-6 months tops (that’s pushing it). I know myself. I do not like other people in my space. My husband knows this as well. I have stressed over how I never want any family members living with us ever!

I just feel like I’m drowning because I can’t say how I really feel without him thinking I’m evil. Plus I’m 6 weeks pregnant so I am very emotional.

I just want to thank all of you for giving me your input. I couldn’t sleep last night at all. I was up crying because I felt that I am a horrible person for not wanting his mom to live with us. But I need to do what i think is best for me and my family. I will talk with my husband and let him know exactly how I feel. I just hope I can do it without crying.

Update: I talked to my husband and now I’m pretty sure he hates me. I told him exactly what I wrote that I love how our family is now and having his mom move in will change that. He responded with, “its not going to be the same when the baby comes.” I told him that was different. When I asked him how long she would stay, he said, “I don’t know. I guess as long as she needs to get on her feet, but I’m not going to give you a time frame because you’ll hold me to that. I asked if it was going to be more than a year. And he said probably. Immediately, i said then no. He said, “fine, I’ll just tell her that you don’t want her to live with us” and walked out of the room.

I honestly don’t know what to do at this point. My marriage will never be the same.