I’m holding on by straws here...

Say you have been married for 11 years. After four years, your daughter is born and your husband goes on anxiety and depression meds. Two years later, he quits holding your hand and never kisses you anymore. Then two years later your son is born, he no longer talks with you and never hugs you anymore either now. So he never hugs or kisses you, never holds your hand or wants to talk with you. You try to talk with him about everything and it always leads to him walking off and it going nowhere. Now, you are pg with #3 by some miraculous accident. Now not only does he not hug or kiss you, hold your hand, talk to you, or spend time with you, those once a month “alone” sessions have disappeared. He will ask you every now and then, but will do it when he KNOWS that it is not a possibility in the moment. When you finish what you’re doing and come back to him, he will have already snuck off to the bathroom and taken care of himself and wants nothing to do with you again. He will get so excited when one of the kids won’t go to bed so he isn’t alone with you (in your opinion). If you get them to bed, he almost visibly panics and tries to find stuff to do until one of the Kids wake up and then he is visibly relieved. If they don’t, and he runs out of stuff to do, he will run off to bed. There is no intimacy between you anymore... physically, emotionally, intellectually, there is nothing. His saying ‘I love you’ sounds just like a robot. You feel like a pregnant single mother who spends all day cleaning and taking care of kids while your room mate pays the bills. Your room mate comes home late every night, eats, plays on his phone and goes to bed... oh, and he demands that one of the kids lay between y’all every night... just don’t even feel like trying to save this anymore...