Relationship advice

How do you know if you are happy in your relationship? I need to know. I haven’t happy in so long. I don’t want to leave because I wanna see my children everyday. I almost didn’t marry him. But I was pregnant. And now we have two boys and all I can think about is having a nice guy in my life that wants to kiss me. Snuggle me. Spend time away from home with me. Not be pissed at me all time. Idk. He’s working on it now.. but he’s done so much damage to me that I’m just wrecked. Destroyed. Idk what to do.