I f***ed up

Ok so my husband and I got in to a huge fight we been fighting all day my hormones are crazy and well I'm suppose to be on antidepressants and I ran out 2 days ago anyway...i have felt like yes been picking at me all day he always has something to say either about my parenting or my job as a stay at home mom or having a secret girlfriend he thinks hes joking and being funny cause well hes crude that way well after I got upset that last time he went to take a shower well when he got out he said i was a fucking bitch and was psycho he works out of town so he started packing I didnt help i just cried and when i told him i dont know how to fix things cause we fight like this alot he just walked off well i told him I would just stay at my parents and well I got to here how awful I am without my meds and he hates me well I started packing and he kept on about the meds and I lost it I threw my shoes at him down the stairs walked behind him and hit him and he restrained me and it scared me so I stopped and realized how stupid that was well that was it I pushed to far and he wanted me gone tonight I apologized and told him that's not what I want well after awhile he left to work idk how to fix this we both have a problem and need to work on things but i let my anger take control and now I'm scared i cant fix it i need yalls help or advice i should have never hit him like that help