Ovulation let down

Thought I was about to ovulate with the dip on cycle day 20 I was so excited to temp this morning sure it was going to be up again....... then this I was so bummed I just started crying. I really thought this was gonna be our month but I’ve got a feeling I’m just not gonna ovulate.

Haven’t gotten a blaring positive opk yet, got super close on day 17 & 20 and they’ve just been lighter and lighter since. I wish someone warned me birth control could put me so out of whack after :(

It’s so hard watching your friend who’d rather be able to drink get pregnant and your 2 coworkers pregnant with there second.