with my first I suffered from untreated postpartum psychosis. I didn't want to hurt my child, but I was so unattached for a while I wasn't sure she was even mine and wanted to put her up for adoption, I was certain she hated me already. it was nearly the end of my marriage. when she was 3 months they put me on antidepressants but my reaction to them was so severe, I quit taking them, I had become a zombie. not eating, sleeping, showering, incapable of caring for myself let alone my infant. my midwives are wanting to put me on antidepressants at 34 weeks so it's in my system when baby is born. at first, this sounded like a great idea, but then I started thinking about how they want me to breastfeed but how will that effect my milk? i really wanted to try to breastfeed but I was unable to with my first. however if I am able to produce this time would it effect my baby? then, what if I become a zombie again? or worse, this being a tribal hospital and me not being a tribal member, after baby is born they will only treat me for a little while after...which means I'll essentially be detoxing while caring for a 7 year old and 2 or 3 month old, unless I can get insurance and a Dr who will prescribe the same prescription. of course I'm going to speak to my midwives about it, I just don't know what the right thing to do now is