Can no longer cope

Getting a bloody sickness bug a week after ovulation and every time I feel sick/ can’t eat or have a watery mouth I’m constantly thinking OMG am I pregnant but knowing full well it’s far too early for symptoms so I’m just ill 😭😭😭 my due date is fast approaching and I really hoped I would have conceived my rainbow before it came. Instead I have to watch someone I work with prepare for his bundle of joy the week before my baby would have been due. Why does the world have to be so cruel and dark. I just want to break down.