is this ocd or i’m just crazy? or what is going on?
i’ve been struggling w this for as long as i can remember. whenever i go to the bathroom, i take FOREVER to come out because i wipe repeatedly because i feel like i’m never clean enough. then, after i convince myself to stop i suddenly get the urge AGAIN to wipe. so, i sit back down and start all over again. when i wash my hands it’s the same thing! i wash them over and over and over and over. my hands are literally always bleeding because of how much i wash them. the other day i had just finished washing my hands and i was chilling in bed when all of a sudden i felt the strong urge to wash my hands again because they felt so dirty so i went back into the bathroom and washed them a million times again. when i clean my ears, scrub my body, wash my hair, wash my face, anything that includes anything within myself i tend to repeat SO MANY TIMES. it’s crazy it drives me insane. even after i spent hours showering or using the restroom and i’m lying in bed, i start thinking “you probably didn’t scrub enough you probably didn’t cleanse your face enough” i literally feel like my brain never stops telling me that i haven’t done enough. i only have this repetitive behavior when it comes down to myself and my hygiene.
im sorry if this is all over the place but i’m so stressed out rn and this is driving me so insane. i told my mom about it and she says she’ll take me to get help, but i don’t wanna get there and have them tell me i’m completely normal. i don’t wanna go in there and look crazy.