Should I ask him to stop smoking???

Question

So my 6 year old is starting to get pneumonia every 6 months or so. He has weak lungs and his dad (My ex husband) is a smoker. Like 1 pack a day. The dr has informed me this can be a contributor to his lung issues now and in the future. 
Do I ask him to stop for our son? 
We aren’t together anymore and have been divorced since he was 1 month old. We are both remarried and I have 2 step kids and a 1 year old at home. So our son getting this sick is putting our other kids at risk. And I’m a stay at home mom so when he’s sick, he stays with me. 
I cannot handle watching our son suffer like this. It’s absolutely terrible. I do all I can to strengthen his immune system when he’s with me. We have 50/50 custody. He is a really good dad overall, but he’s been a smoker for over 12 years. I don’t want to come off as demanding either as we are finally coparenting well. How do I approach this without him feeling attacked? Or do I say nothing??

Answer

I would tell him what the doctor said. Maybe give him the docs number so he can confirm. And suggest that he either quits or doesn’t smoke when your son is with him. I bet if you try and demand anything he would push back but I would hope not since it’s your baby’s health!

Answer

I was a smoker for YEARS. He may not quit completely, but you can ask him to go outside and not smoke in his vehicle while he has the baby due to his illness. I never smoked inside my house or in my vehicle because of my son.

Answer

You should have told him as soon as the doctor said it’s a health concern. Second hand smoke is deadly. If dad is smoking in his house and car it can have seriously health effects, not to mention if he is smoking next to the baby.
This is your child. Stand up for him! 
Tell dad the baby cannot be in a smoking home or car and certainly cannot be anywhere near smoke. Dad doesn’t have to smoke but he can’t do it anywhere near baby.

Answer

Id definitely tell him, but I’d also suggest getting the doctor to call him, or vice versa, and he could explain this all, just incase he doesn’t really want to listen or believe you. If he really doesn’t want to quit smoking then I’d say he has to smoke outside of his home so the smoke is no longer inside affecting your child. And if he doesn’t want to help or make it better for your child, then I’d honestly not let your child go to his fathers house anymore.

Answer

Yes I would ask him to stop smoking around your children, in the place where your child lives, and the vehicle your child rides in. I would tell him what the doctor said, and let him know that his smoking is contributing to your son’s health problems. I would let him know that he is not to be smoking around your child and make him aware that even lingering smoke inside the home can affect his health . If he can’t do it, then he’s neglecting your child’s health and you have the right to get CPS or court involved over it.

Answer

I wouldn't ask him to not smoke anymore.. Its really not your business if he's a smoker or not. 
BUT 
I would ask him to not smoke in the house, near the child, or in the vehicle. 
Him smoking isn't your concern, but him smoking near your guys sick child is your concern.

Answer

Just approach it that it’s what your doctor advised. Say something like “the doctor asked if he is around smokers, so I said you did smoke, and the doctor said it can be a big contributing factor. I also worry that he could pass it on to our other children (his and yours)” and see if you can arrange it so he either stops, or at least changes his smoking habits so he never smokes around your son. You may also want to mention the after-effects of constant ling infections. He’s more at risk of chronic pneumatic infections, bronchitis, as well as COPD and even CVD when he’s older. As long as you don’t approach the subject in an attacking manner, I’m sure you can both work something else ☺️

Answer

My husband won’t quit. I make him wash his hands and change his shirt before he picks up the baby and he has to go outside to smoke

Answer

Get some sort of statement from the dr. And then maybe ask him to cut back while he has your son and to not smoke in the house/car/close to your son. If he refuses that's pretty shitty of him to do since it's for the health of your child.

Answer

Definitely talk to him get a doctor's note and information on how it is affecting negatively and how it would benefit him for him to stop. I'd definitely have some evidence though a nod doctor help otherwise he'll just think its u being controlling or something. Good luck.

Should I ask him to stop smoking???

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