Bad mother

I don’t really know why I am posting. My baby would not go to sleep tonight. Rocking didn’t do it, a bottle wouldn’t do it. She didn’t want to be set down. NOTHING. I could feel my anger bubbling. I put her in her crib and walked away but she would not calm down. Guys, I yelled at her. At the top of my lungs like a fucking psycho. Then I picked her up and started to rock her again. Balling my eyes out because I am a piece of shit. Then she looked me in the eyes and reached out to touch my face!!. I fucking hate my self I wish I was dead. I am such a bad mother no matter how many people tell me I am not. I love her so so much but I am already failing her. My lungs are burning I am so upset.