I am 32 weeks today. My husband and I tried for 3.5 years, had two first trimester miscarriages and a ton of other stuff to get to this point.

At my baby shower that my best friend put together, she had a whole table set up dedicated to the two babies I lost. I get it..it’s sweet. And no matter what, I will never forget the journey we have been on to get this sweet baby. The dates will never leave my mind and I will always wonder what if and who would they have been.

My husband and I are not religious. I’m NOT saying we are atheist. We just don’t have a super strong belief. Maybe more agnostic might describe it. And honestly, neither of us knew the other felt that way until after we had been married for probably a year or two.

So at the baby shower on the table, my friend had a sign made that says “Hand picked for earth by my siblings in heaven.” It’s huge. 4ft x 16in. She had it made to match the bedding and expects us to use it in her room.

The problems are that

1. It’s huge and too big to go with the rest of the decor consider #3

2. We aren’t religious

3. I’m already having a sign made by the same lady at the same size with her name on it for above the crib

4. I don’t want my daughter living in the shadows of the two babies we lost. I don’t want the decor of her room centered around something that is reminder of what we went through.

My best friend knows we aren’t super religious. I am not against it by any means. I respect everybody’s beliefs and religion. I will never put somebody down for their beliefs.

How do I tell her that I’m not using the sign in her room without hurting her feelings? I have a feeling she’s going to either think we don’t like it, which I do.. it’s a cute sign. Just not my taste. Maybe if it was smaller I could bring myself to use it. Or she’s going to blame it on the religion card and we are going to fight about it.