I need to vent

First of all my boyfriend is 25, and I’m 20. I’m still in nursing school and he’s a welder and has a really good job. We weren’t trying to have a baby but we weren’t not trying, well anyways we go pregnant in September and we were absolutely THRILLED. he was so excited and that made me even more excited, well my HCG dropped and we had a chemical. I bled October 27-31, I. Was. Devastated. Absolutely heart broken. Still am. It’s like its left a hole in my heart, like it was all a joke, like hey I’m gonna give you a + pregnancy test and then I’m gonna trick you and give you a straight negative and then you’re gonna bled and everything you were ready for your whole world to be is gone just like that. My boyfriend was good when it happened and supportive, but now if I even bring it up he gets mad... basically like “why are you even talking about it?” Like it didn’t happen. I haven’t had a period all of November and my apps are saying my next period isn’t until December 4, we’ve still been trying to have another baby but no luck this month, especially with no period. Here lately I’ll literally be so happy and then the next minute I’ll be bawling my eyes out. Idk right now I just feel so stuck in life.