I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was just 13 years old. On top of it I struggle with anxiety, depression, endometriosis and PTSD. I was married to my first husband for four and a half years. Unfortunately I miscarried every time I got pregnant. It’s a terrible feeling knowing you may never be able to have children. He would tell me all the time, “your so worthless you can’t do the one thing women were put on this earth for.” Every time i lost a baby he said it was my fault. Sometimes even now I still believe it. He always called me names and threw things at me. I felt stuck in my marriage eventually but had the thought every time that maybe a baby would help mend what was so beautiful: he wasn’t always like that. He changed after coming home from a deployment. We did one round of the

<a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a>

and it worked. We were going to have a miracle baby and by 12 weeks the baby was still healthy. When I was 20 weeks, I found out my husband had been cheating for 6 months and having an affair. When I confronted him about it, he was angry. He punched me in the stomach and I went into labor losing our baby boy. He never got in trouble. His parents were able to convince the hospital I was crazy, to avoid having him stay in jail for a year and instead got 30 days. I divorced him. I hated life, I thought I’m no good for anyone. I got my own place and lived by myself for a year slowly trying to rebuild myself up. Six months after my divorce was finalized, I met the man I am currently married to. He didn’t judge me. He didn’t care that I had the thought of being ok trying to have a child with someone just because I wanted a baby. He was so kind and loving. I found out he had a daughter. She was three when I met her. He and I became friends and eventually he told me he loved me and I had fallen hard. I can’t tell you how happy I am to have finally met someone who is so genuine. We got married a year ago on 10/28/2017. His daughter now calls me mommy and is so sweet. It’s so so hard knowing that I’m still struggling with infertility. And anytime someone says well I tried for three months and didn’t think I would be able to have any legitimately makes me so sad because I am currently going on almost 9 years without being successful. I hope that someday it happens because having a baby has always been a dream. We have thought about surrogacy, adoption and foster care but we decided to try for at least two more years. This is my picture of my beautiful family.