My own "Love life"

I dont necessarily have and past love life. Im a freshmen and there is this guy that I kinda like. I mean he is a good friend but I couldnt really see us dating. He gives off semi hints but it could also just be him, being a kind person. He talked on his personal channel that he was trying to tell someone that he liked them but he was afraid to ruin the friendship. Then when I went to a place for an audition he was in a room dancing weirdly with one of his friends and his friend asked, is that he.... and then I walked faster and faster. It could have ment nothing but I cant help but wonder. I wonder what it would be like if someone would love me in a certaint way, someone to care for me and stay by my side by their choice. Not just bc im there friend. I never really had an interest in dating or love but now my mind wonders to its possibilities. I dont want it nor need it but I still think about it. Let me also mention that in the summer I asked if her wanted to go to this really cool walking/eating/shopping area. He thought I asked him on a date. His friend told me once we started talking again. My ex/actual friend told me he thought I was weird. So I wanted to explain that I just wanted to walk and talk but my friend told me that he would kill him if he found out that my friend told me. I just need my mind somewhere else rn.