We met on an online dating app. Yea. Don’t judge me. Lol. He’s in the military. Home town though is only acouple hrs from me. He’s been in the military for over 10 years. He doesn’t plan on resigning though once this contract is up in a little over a year because he “doesn’t like where the military is headed”. He’s a mechanic and welder. We talked a couple months and then he met me and stayed with me for a few days recently. Things lately have been confusing me however. I know the online thing is tricky. You grow feelings for someone after talking to him very closely for a length of time and then when you meet in person in a way it’s kind of like starting over. Learning them in a new way. It’s also tricky because people can paint some perfect picture when your only knowing one another through text calls FaceTime etc and sometimes when you meet them, sure it’s great, but maybe I wasn’t everything he painted me to be? Maybe I’m beating myself up for no reason.
He tried hard before.. I mean hed often express love to me and was checking in on me. Called me often. Would send me those random pictures with quotes on them to make me smile. Tagged me in things on fbk. Etc. After being together yes he kept in contact. Never once stated he was unhappy. And he’s always... kind. Says things like- good morning my beautiful. Good night love. Calls me baby. Love. Beautiful often. If I wonder if something is wrong he tells me there’s nothing wrong and is sweet about it. But.... he doesn’t really ask me questions anymore. He doesn’t check in as much as before. He doesn’t offer up any emotional thing really but will respond to mine. And lately he has only told me he loves me when I have said it. And no. We don’t flood each other. But even before bed. Through text. He says goodnight love. But leaves the I love you out. It’s odd. I don’t push. Just... feel a distance. It’s so odd. Because he’s always kind. And calls me sweet things. But had backed off alittle in a way. We are due to meet up again in a couple weeks. Before he would take initiative to tell me what I meant to him or would do or say sweet random things. And he doesn’t now.
Keep in mind hes out in the field right now sleeping in 30 degree weather etc, being military isn’t easy. But before it didn’t matter. Just need some insight.
He almost acts maybe like he doesn’t .. care? Like my grandmother is in the hospital this morning. I’m concerned. I message him. He says “I’m sorry love”. But doesn’t ask me any questions about it. So I explain briefly whats going on with her. And he responds “ok baby”. ??? It’s just weird. Like he’s sweet. But. Almost like he doesn’t care? Does that make sense or am I misreading things.
(We are both 30. I have two sons. I have a career.)