13 and pregnant??

Question

My daughter was at a friends house when i went in her room to grab something and i saw a pregnancy test in the trash. Being nosey, i pick it up and it was positive. I don’t have any other daughters besides my 13 yr old. How do i talk to her about it??
Edit:: She came to me today crying and told me she was pregnant and sorry. I took y’all’s advice (thanks btw) and took her in my arms and told her it would be okay. She told me she wanted to keep it and i’m perfectly fine with that. Honestly i didn’t even yell at all. My baby is having a baby!!

Accepted Answer

If it was my 13 year old I’d sit her down, tell her I found it, and tell her I’m taking her to the doctor so she can get the care she and the baby would need. Don’t shame her, she is probably scared out of her mind, and afraid that you’ll disown her or kick her out. But the sooner you talk with her and get her help, the sooner you can help her decide what she wants to do about the pregnancy.

Answer

Don’t do what my mom did. I’m pregnant and turning 16 on the 1st. When I told my mom I was pregnant I sat in bed with her and her boyfriend and when I tried to say it I just started balling. She asked if I was pregnant and I nodded. She sighed and very uncomfortably hugged me. She immediately assumed I would get an abortion. After I told her I’m keeping the baby she made me write an essay on why I should be allowed to keep MY BABY😒 then after I kept telling her that I’m keeping it she and her boyfriend (he’s not my dad don’t like to refer to him as such) decided to contact one of their friends who had been looking to adopt. IVE NEVER MET HER AND THEY NEVER ASKED ME IF THEY COULD! Honestly my family was so hurtful throughout this whole pregnancy especially my mother. I’m due in 4 weeks and I have really bad anxiety so I have an anxiety cat, when we moved my moms bf made my cat start sleeping in the garage and she’s not allowed to come into the house at all. I expressed my feelings of wanting my cat back and she replied “you gave up the right to have a cat when you got pregnant” when we were on our way to my anatomy scan I said I hope it’s a boy, she replied “if you didn’t want a girl you shouldn’t have gotten pregnant” don’t be like my mom. Show your daughter that you’re there for her and that you love her no matter what decision she makes because at the end of the day it’s still her baby and it’s your grandbaby. Once my baby’s dad moves out and moves closer to us I’m moving in with him and cutting off as much contact as possible with my family because of all the terrible things they’ve said and done these past nine months. If you want to love that baby and keep your daughter close I beg you to please show her you love her and don’t chase her away.

Answer

i’m a teenager (18) and pregnant with a girl, so i can give you advice from two different perspectives. first, my advice as a pregnant teenager, is give her time. wait a couple days and see if she comes to you. if not, ben sit her down and talk to her about it, but for the love of all that is good and pure, please don’t be angry or stern; save that for later. she needs your support more than your tough love right now. my own mother kicked me out when she found out, which only made things harder for me. and my advice as a soon-to-be mother is that if it was my little girl, i know i would be heartbroken. i would be absolutely distraught. which is another reason why i think you should wait a few days before you talk to her; you have your own emotions to work through right now, and it’s best that you sort through them before talking to your daughter.
i wish you the best, please update us❤️

Answer

She obviously wanted you to find it and reach out. I agree with previous replies. Don’t shame her. Take her to doctor get her the care she needs and make a section together. I can’t imagine being in this position I wish you and her all the best! 💜💜💜💜

Answer

I would talk to her. It could of been negative and after sitting became a false positive.  Or could not even be her test. I would calmly talk to her and explain the importance of having safe sex if she DOES have sex. Take her to a dr for an examination and birth control pills if she insists on being sexually active.  
Remeber you're her mom she looks up to you and how you handle this can determine if she ever comes to you with a problem or not.
Remind her no matter what you love her

Answer

Even if she says a friend took it at yalls house, I’d still take her to the doctor to be checked out. She’s probably scared. But it’s obviously nothing that can be ignored.

Answer

You need to talk to her, it may not even be hers. In that case you need to find out which girl it is so her parents know. If it is your daughter I agree with the other comments don’t shame her, take her to the doctor her being that young will require some extra attention. Goodluck to all of you.

Answer

when did she have the baby. Update??!

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Any updates ???

Answer

It will be hard to stay cool when approaching it with her, because you’re stressed and worried but it’s imperative to keep open communication lines. 
She may have heard that by kissing or holding hands with a boy you can get pregnant (despite the best of sex education, kids will believe rumours from their peers) or it could have been from a friend not wanting to use it at their house. Honestly, I wasn’t sexually active til 18 but due to extremely limited info from my parents and schooling (mum still calls my reproductive organs my ‘tummy’, for example) I legitimately thought one day that some gas pains I was having meant I was going into secret labour 😳🤦🏼‍♀️
Listen to her carefully and if she has been sexually active it’s off to the doctor for a good chat, an STD screen and consideration of birth control. 
With this day and age of internet accessibility it’s important to ensure she’s keeping herself safe online and hasn’t been in touch with any older kids too. 
All the best

13 and pregnant??

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