I’m 29 and quite happy to be pregnant. This is my first, and my husband and I were trying to conceive, so this baby is wanted. That being said, I think it’s quite ok not to be over the moon every second of your pregnancy. And if you happen to be someone who is, that’s great! No judgment. But I think many of us go through ups and downs about it all.

Many of us have those people in our lives who are super over the moon excited for us. They ask us how excited we are all the time. It’s all roses and they expect us to be similarly rosy about everything to do with our pregnancies all the time.

Yes I’m excited, but I’m also nervous and a little scared about birth, and not looking forward to a giant belly and afraid of the discomfort and pain that comes with advancing pregnancy, delivery and postpartum. Yes this baby will be worth it, but it doesn’t mean it’s all roses or that I need to be excited about all of it all the time.

And it’s really frustrating when these people press you, so you confess that you do have some worries or misgivings and they say things like, “it will be fine” or “women have been doing this since the beginning of time”. Yes I know. I do have a common sense side, but still, women do die, terribly painful things do happen, and even when everything goes “right” it doesn’t mean women don’t have a right to feel worry, nervousness, pain, discomfort, misgivings, etc. We’re human and this is life changing. Sometimes I’m not thrilled to be pregnant, and that doesn’t mean I don’t want to have this baby, it means some of the side effects suck, and it’s ok to feel that way.

I guess I’m just venting a little. I don’t like when people minimize my feelings. I mostly keep them to myself so when someone presses me and I do open up, I don’t think it’s helpful to say, “don’t worry about it” or other similar statements. The difference between child birth and other painful events, is that usually you don’t know other painful evens are coming. You don’t know about the car crash or the illness around the corner, they happen and you have to deal with them. But with pregnancy, you get 40 weeks to look forward to what can be a very painful and difficult experience. Not to mention 40 weeks of morning sickness, back pain, mood swings, stretch marks, blotchy skin, difficulty sleeping, etc.

Yes I know I will likely be fine and forget it all when I have my baby in my arms. But I’m human, and the idea of pregnancy and everything that comes with it sometimes makes me nervous and a little scared. AND THATS OKAY.