How do I move on?

Question

So I’ve put a few posts on here and everyone has been really helpful and supportive. But after my first round of ICSI I’ve had my BFN. I’m distraught, how do I move on from this? 
We only got 1 embryo suitable for transfer and none suitable for freezing so we’re back to square one, but this first round has cost double what we thought it would, I’m not sure everything was explained to us at the beginning because we genuinely didn’t know about all the hidden costs. Now we have no money left and we’ve got nowhere. 
How am I suppose to deal with this? It’s too difficult.

Answer

I'm so sorry your dealing with this situation. Infertility is just terrible!! I just found out today my 4th and final FET was another failure. No embryos left. I know this situation to well. I wish I had better advice but I'm going to try to focus on me for a while. Exercise, eat healthy and hopefully lose 20lbs. After I have a nice glass of wine tonight! I also have a trip coming up I'm going to try to focus on. Do something positive for yourself ,something that makes you happy. I wish you the best. Sorry I dont have a magical solution for you. Hugs

Answer

Big hugs. Infertility is so emotional because there are no guarantees. And the hope we all carry gets dashed so many times along the way. I had 5 cycles and had only planned for 2. The first one we got 10 eggs and 0 fertilized. We didn't know of anything was even going to be possible....and I went to really dark emotional places. Time let's you think things through and with your partner you decide what you both want, and what sacrifices you want to make to get there.
Money is a big part of it, and will dictate some of your options. I saw you were UK, look into Spain which is the world leader on IVF and cheaper than many places too - it might be a way to make some $$ work better.
Or it's ok if you both choose this was it, a life with no children is Rich and rewarding, I had 22 years no kids with hubby and we loved it!
Again, big hugs as you go through the emotional process.

Answer

It's hard we had 3 rounds and now are financially crippled but got pregnant from it, baby will not have many material items at this rate. We will get there but things like boiler breaking and needing replacement on top and house sale falling through (was meant to free up some cash to pay off debt) plus incurring solicitors fees on it has left us maxed out with more bills coming in! We still have to pay for the intralipids at the clinic and yes your right there's lots of hidden costs, my clinic seem to over prescribe the drugs as well which isn't helpful as it's a waste of money. You just need to figure real costs out we used access fertility to help in the UK and ASDA supply drugs at cost no profit much to my clinics annoyance that they couldn't make more cash on us. My advice is if you do another round throw everything at it we paid extra for Embryogen and got better results quality and quantity wise. Also have a buffer of money in case unforseen things happen X

Answer

Hi. I'm so sorry you are struggling. After 2 MC and 2 chemicals within a year I was/am really struggling too. I decided to seek out a therapist to help me. She has been great and I feel really lucky we connected. She has helped me with my anxiety, depression, obsessive thinking, my marriage... because this pregnancy journey has impacted everything. I also like her cuz I don't want to burn out my friends/family with this so she is a safe and healthy outlet. I highly recommend trying to find a professional. It's not a life time commitment... it can help you work through this.

Answer

We are also moving onto cycle 2. Here’s what we did—Whole 30, to focus on our health, and added supplements to improve egg and sperm quality. Then we looked around decided to leave our clinic and go abroad. Hello vacation and vitamin d! Our works consider it FMLA time and it is paid sick/vacation time, we took 3 weeks but you could do as little as 2. The clinics outside the US are more holistic and we get a spa packages to help with blood flow and relaxation during our 2 week treatment. It will cost us 40% of what the first round did. Meds are cheaper when you buy outside the US too. We opened an 18 month 0% interest card. We had some savings, but this will cover the rest for us.

Answer

Sending you hugs and good thoughts!!!💞💞💞💞💞💞

How do I move on?

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