Emotional mess

I’ve never been the one to post but I feel like I need to. I’ve worked with kids all my life, which honestly made me love kids. I’ve finally convinced my husband to have kids and have been trying for 6 months. This month I was getting so exited because I was 16 days late we had been trying so hard. we had sex and not more than an hour later I started my period. I sat there on the toilet crying my eyes out. I wanted this to not happen for me more than anything. I want kids so bad. It seems like everyone around me has expressed they hate kids or they don’t want them and next thing you know they are posting online........ “So exited to start a family” why is it when you want something so bad, it always seems like every month is just going to disappoint you.