So as embarrassing as this is to admit, I’ve always dreamed of that perfect best friend that you see all those shows about, all those posts about, etc. but the only time I’ve experienced it was over 3 years ago, and it turned into an absolutely toxic, one-sided friendship.

I feel like this really effected the way I branch out and meet/trust people, and I feel like I’ve never had a friend as close as I did then. I’ve now been in college for 2 years and this isn’t me complaining that I don’t have any friends, because that’s not the case. I have a wonderful boyfriend, his roommate (who is one of my best friends) and multiple others that I consider my friends.

The issue is, I’ve never connected with someone the way I did my ex best friend. I’ve never found someone that’s been so like me and that I had the picture perfect girly friendship with.

When I got to college, I met the few people I did and I feel like I shut myself out from the rest because of the fear. Now that it’s been 2 years since I’ve started college, I feel like I can’t find any new friendships because all the group of people are already established (if that makes sense)

From here, I’ve joined a handful of clubs this year and I’m trying to get included but I still feel I can’t find my people. I’ve considered signing up for “friend finding” apps to find people in my area, but something about that just seems like it wouldn’t work.

I just feel like I have no where to go from here and I just need some advice