Trying Ass Week 😩

Let me start by saying, I love my husband, our sex life is great and we have a wonderful marriage.... normally. This past week have been kinda touch and go. We haven't been arguing, just both a bit short and not talking as much. Normally we'd have sex at least 3 days out of a week, the days he's home from work. However, this last week I've had alot on my mind, with looking for a job, finishing up assignments for school and contemplating my next step after completing my degree program.

As mentioned, we haven't been having the ideal week, starting with him turning down another idea I had for a lil vacation this summer. We've never taken a trip together or anything and I figured since I'll be graduating, maybe we could celebrate. My friends have actually started planning for a trip to FL and as a graduation gift, they wanted to take us. He said no, as usual and his excuse was we're already going to Atl for the ceremony, we don't need two trips. 😒

Now, the trip to Atl would take 2-3 days tops, we're staying at his aunt's house just for 1 night, going to the ceremony, then heading back. There's no vacation, no romance, just me receiving my degree and heading back home. I honestly want to go with our friends and enjoy some music, pools, beaches, a hotel room with just the two of us, champagne maybe...an adult time but we can't. I've just been thinking about how final his response was and how now i have to break it to our friends who already started planning things.

Another issue we've had and it's not new, just getting to be too much, is his drinking. He'll buy a gallon of vodka and go through half of it in less than 48 hours. He gets real annoyingly loud and rough when he drinks like that. He's not aggressive in an angry way but he's insulting and plays in ways that hurts later and then he'll say "oh, you're always getting hurt". I've tried talking to him and he just gets angry, so I've gone a couple years not saying anything, just staying out of his way when he drinks and pretty much letting the kids know not to be too much when he's like that.

There's just so much on my mind, which brings me to tonight's problem. I've been having some back aches and stomach cramps all day, so I lay down next to him and drift off to sleep. His arms were around me, rubbing my stomach, so he knew I wasn't feeling well. I was out for like 5 mins to wake up to him feeling on my breasts, ass and vagina, with a stiffy poking my thigh. I told him to stop because again, I wasn't feeling well. He didn't take that too well and said that I've mastered the art of pushing him away but whatever he'll stop... sighed real heavily then turned away and got on his phone. Not too long before that we were cuddled up going to sleep, why can't he just lay with me without leading to sex? Also, I wasn't feeling well and normally I would join in no problem, so why act like that?

Honestly, at this point I don't really feel like bringing anything up, I'm just kinda tired of the stupid petty shit. I should be able to reject his advances and not feel like i'm dealing with an asshole in a club.