I’m 26 weeks pregnant and so far my MIL has invited herself to be too involved in my pregnancy. I invited her to an ultrasound for my 13 week appointment (My OB does one at every appointment) and since then she has invited herself to every single ultrasound. At my next appointment she asked my SO “What time are we leaving for the ultrasound?” And she had not been invited. About a week ago I went to the ER because I hadn’t felt any movements from my daughter in nearly 24 hours. My SO texted my MIL to tell her what was going on, and she met us at the hospital, again, without being invited. She also brought her husband along with her which was extremely frustrating, because after not feeling my baby move I was extremely stressed and emotional and I did not want to go through those emotions with the whole family there. I wanted it to be just me and my SO when we found out if our daughter was okay or not.

I am really grateful that she wants to be so involved but it’s also frustrating. She is taking things too far and becoming kind of controlling. It’s like she thinks this is her pregnancy too. We settled on a name for our daughter months ago and she keeps googling “cute baby girl names” and suggesting them to us because she doesn’t like the name we chose. I also decided on an Elephant theme for our daughter and she has proceeded to buy bulks of Unicorn theme clothing and other items because she thinks the “Elephant theme is outdated and I need to go with Unicorns.”

This is not her pregnancy, it’s mine. I want this experience to be something personal and special between me and my SO and I want it to be ours. I would still love for my MIL to come to SOME appointments, but not all of them. I want to share this experience with my SO in a more personal way. I don’t know what to do or how to tell her to back off a little bit.

My initial plan was for her to be in the room when the baby is born but I have now changed my mind. Since she has been so overly involved I’ve decided I don’t want her in the room anymore. It seems like the delivery of my daughter will be our last option to share this experience in a more personal way. I don’t want to look back on every single ultrasound and my daughter’s delivery and see my MIL in the background of my memory.

Has anybody else experience having an overbearing MIL or other relative? And who was in the room when you delivered?