What do I do?

So recently I got a new bff and she was all good and she's lovely but then she started dating one of my exes and I was like 'okay I wasn't that serious with him anyway' and then she had a crush on my other ex the one that I was very serious with and I still liked and then she broke up with my other ex for this one and I cried for days and days on end and I even thought about suicide and I didn't do it though I just cut myself and now i have to pretend I fell over and scraped my arm

Also now my ex bff is being really rude to me and giving a really hard time so I need a lot of advice so if u could comment some that would be really appreciated thanks ❤️