Ashamed
I recently got divorced ( December ) and recently started having sex again with someone else . This is the lowest I’ve ever felt as with my first relationship , I waited until marriage to have sex . After the divorce , I really started falling apart and I’m afraid I might be pregnant . I took an emergency contraceptive after the deed and was certain that it would be effective . I haven’t been so clued up on the morning after because I’ve never had to use it and just learnt that it doesn’t work when you’re already ovulating . I come from a strict religious background and I just lost myself for a while . Having to abort this seed would make me feel even more guilty . I don’t know what to do . I’ve been waiting for my period , already contemplating abortion pill and never thought this would ever be me . How did I get here 💔💔💔💔
Edit : so I found out that I was pregnant this morning and I feel so numb . I’ve already decided that I would terminate the pregnancy as I really cannot go through the humiliation and shame .
My family would be devastated. My ex husband and I are still not on good terms and I know this would be used against me for the rest of my life . I never thought that I’d ever have to abort . No one in my family had children out of wedlock . The fact that I’ve only been divorced less than 6 months will make it seem like I left because I was already involved with this other man and that’s not the case ! I’m so angry at myself . Prior to finding out , I prayed so hard that God pardon me for my sin and not allow my womb to be a source of humiliation for me , but I guess I deserve this 💔💔💔. They said I had to wait until 4 weeks pregnant to terminate the pregnancy at the abortion clinic . I look at my son who is about to turn 3 and I feel so ashamed . When I found out I was expecting him I was sooooo overjoyed and happy because it’s what me and my husband wanted . Now ... I’m so broken .
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