Unplanned/unexpected pregnancy....

So I just got a bfp, my period was due yesterday or today. It's supposed to be an exciting time right???

Well I am so scared..... I have a 27month old and an 11month old by my husband.

I have a 17, 15, and 12yr old from a previous marriage.

I was in a domestic violence marriage 13 years ago. I had a hard time getting pregnant with my toddler, and my 11month old was a surprise pregnancy. But this is just so depressing for me, I don't understand what happened.... I mean I knew it could happen, since we were just tracking my cycle and using condoms. I am so disappointed in myself 😭😭

I can't stop crying and thinking about what's going to happen now, I feel too old for this (33) How am I going to take care of another baby😢😢😢😢

I have so many things on my mind, I just needed to vent 😢😭😭😭😭