Today

My d&c is in a few hours and I just want this to not be happening. Why couldn’t I of gotten good news Wednesday? Why couldn’t they of come in with my new ultrasound picture of the 12 week old baby that had still been growing inside of me? Why did my body choose once again that this baby wasn’t meant for earth? I just don’t understand and I’m just so sad, and mad. Why can’t this just be all a bad dream?

My heart is shattered.