Backstory: My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 7-8 months. We recently hit a rough patch and took about a week of space where we talked very little (but still kept in contact) and didn’t see each other. We weren’t sure if we were going to work things out or not just based on some things going on in our personal lives that were effecting our relationship negatively. We ended up talking things through. This was about 2 weeks ago.

Yesterday I had his phone to text his dad while he was driving and I saw some messages to/from a girl. The messages were calling her beautiful, asking if she was single (she wasn’t but a couple days later she was 🤔), saying he was just gonna give it a shot and maybe they could hang out in a couple weeks (giving time to decide if we’re going to work it out or not). He never met her, got her number from a friends girlfriend that doesn’t know me/that we are together (the friend wasn’t around at the time this conversation took place I can confirm that). When I confronted him he felt super guilty and said he was just not sure if we were going to work out and he hasn’t talked to her since we worked things out (again, based on the messages I can confirm this is true). It hurt me pretty badly, and he knows that and he is sorry and feels super bad. I can kind of see where he is coming from in his guy mind about having a back up/ get-over-my-ex-sex and he didn’t do anything with her or even meet her since we weren’t broken up yet, and he completely stopped talking to her when we worked things out. I told him that I wanted him to delete her from social media (they have mutual friends) and delete her from his phone. Am I crazy for being hurt by this even though he didn’t technically do anything with her besides a little flirting? I feel like he should’ve waited until we were 100% broken up to find his break up fuck.

Also, I want to mention he is NOT making me feel this way, he isn’t telling me I’m crazy or shouldn’t be hurt. He knows I’m hurt and he feels super guilty for it and is trying to make it up to me and willing to do whatever I need him to for me to feel better about all this. I’m just really torn on if I’m feeling too much here.