Long Distance

So I’m currently doing long distance with my high school boyfriend (now college freshman). We broke up towards the end of senior year because I had decided I was going to another state for college and we were dealing with the stress of finals and college applications and stuff.

Anyways we were broken up for about a month then started seeing each other on and off in secret from our friends in family to avoid explanations. After I moved we occasionally talked (as friends) but ultimately fell out of contact.

As winter break was approaching we reconnected and spent time together while I was back home and decided we still loved eachother and wanted to give long distance a chance, we have been FaceTiming and texting daily since then.

The problem is now I know he sees me as his forever and is willing to sacrifice pretty much anything to be with me and I’m just not sure I feel the same. I don’t know if I still love him or just the idea of the relationship that we had in high school. I definitely feel lonely here in college, I haven’t made as many close friends as I had back home and I’m not sure if I’m just clinging on to our relationship because it reminds me of home and being happy.

I feel like I’m some ways being here has given me independence to see who I am by myself but I am lonely without having my boyfriend or best friend here. But I really don’t know what its like to be completely independent from my hometown friends / boyfriend

Please give any advice you have! I don’t know if it’s worth it to sacrifice this relationship I’ve had for 4 years just because I’m doubting myself