I am just so tired. Physically and mentally. I don’t want to do anything but at the same time, I want to do everything. Sometimes I’m scared to die, other times I really wouldn’t care. I’m either worried about everything, or numb to everything and don’t care. I just want to sleep my life away at this point. I have no motivation to do anything. I’m on medication & it’s not helping me yet. I want to go talk to a therapist but I feel like there’s no hope for me and I’ll never get better, I’ve been feeling like this since I was 12 and I’m now almost 21. I always feel like I need to smoke weed or drink to feel something and be happy. I don’t want to be this way at all but I don’t know how to snap out of this. My life has been a complete roller coaster for years and it hasn’t gotten better. I just want to know what it feels like to be genuinely happy. I feel like pushing everyone away because I just want to be left alone and people constantly annoy me. Anyone else feel like this? 😕